Signs

On a septic tank truck
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

Sign over a gynaecologist's office
Dr Jones, at your cervix

On a plumber's truck
Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber

On a Pizza shop
7 days without pizza makes one weak

At a tireshop
Invite us to your next blowout

On a plastic surgeon's office door
Hello. Can we pick your nose?

At a towing company
We don't charge an arm and a leg, we want tows

On an electrician's truck
Let us remove your shorts

In a non-smoking area
If we see you smoke, we will assume you are on fire, and will take appropriate action

On a maternity room door
Push. Push. Push.

At an optometrist's office
If you don't see what you are looking for, you have come to the right place

On a taxidermist's window
We really know our stuff

In a podiatrist's office
Time wounds all heels

On a fence
Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive.

At a car dealership
The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment

Outside a muffler shop
No appointment necessary. We hear you coming

In a vet's waiting room
Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!

At the electric company
We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be

In a restaurant window
Don't stand there being hungry. Come on in and get fed up

In the front yard of a funeral home
Drive carefully. We'll wait.

At a propane filling station
Thank heaven for little grills

At a radiator shop
Best place in town to take a leak